Saturday, July 24, 2010


Ever been stuck? Happened to me.

So, when I was 4, I had a birthday. Did you have one of those? I did. My 4th birthday was at McDonalds (don't ask why...I never did). The playground at this particular McDonalds had a barred fenced around it...quite prisonesque...a good place for a 4 year old.

Anyways, things got carried away. I'm not completely sure how, but my head ended up in between the bars. This would be a good time to tell you that I have large ears.

Not me (poor baby), but you get the picture. Anyways, my head got stuck. Not like, "Hey, stick some butter on his head, we'll slide him out". No. More like "Hey! FUCK! Call the fucking fire department, this child is stuck."

I like math...lets do some.

Not the best equation, but you get the picture. In order to avoid all the screaming and lawsuits, I'll skip to the end. McDonalds employees had to actually do work and call 911. head (ears) was (were) stuck SO bad, that the mother fucking fire department had to come and CUT THE BARS in order to get my head out.

New question...ever been traumatized?

Happened to me.

- Dr. Jones

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